The "good" old days

The other day a cousin of mine had posted a few old photos on face book and it got me thinking about the old days, remembering what it was like 10, 20 or 30 years ago so I went through the photos I had scanned on my computer and put some up on face book as well.  But when I look at the pictures I wonder if it is true "that a photo speaks a thousand words" or "pictures don't lie" then why don't you see the whole story when you look at them?

If you look at picutres of when I was a child you see three children that look happy and loved, well cared for and well behaved.  You see a family that loves each other and enjoys spending quality time together.  But that isn't the whole story not even close to the whole story.  My mother has a photo on her wall taken when I was about 12, it is the only family photo we ever had taken, there are no shots of our family at the beach together; or in front of the Christmas tree.  When pictures were taken there was 'mom and the kids' or 'dad and the kids' never all of us together.  Don't get me wrong it isn't that these pictures don't bring back great memories but they only tell part of the story.  

Thinking of this makes me think of the pictures I take today of my children, the ones I send out on my Christmas card every year telling people "look at our happy, beautiful family" but that isn't the whole story.  When you look at those pictures you don't see a couple who is struggling to keep their marriage together with all the struggles and conflicts they are going through on a daily basis.  You don't see a teenage boy who is struggling to figure out what to do with his life and unsure of himself and his relationships with his family.  You don't see a teenage girl who is angry at her parents for not allowing her to date the coolest boy ever, or for making her come in at 9 on school nights when all her friends are allowed to stay out late.  You don't see a young girl battling between her love for her mother and the love for her father, a girl who doesn't really know where she belongs in this world or where she really wants to be.  And you don't see a little boy who so desperately wants to be grown up like everyone else, who pushes the limits everyday to find his voice in a large family.  You see beautiful children with beautiful smiles and perfect clothes.  You see six people all cuddled together like they have never been happier in their lives when the truth it is there was a huge blow out five minutes before the picture was taken over how inappropriate the shirt your son is wearing is, or about the fact that your daughter is showing too much skin for a family photo, or over the fact that the youngest two children won't stop arguing.  

If a picture says a thousand words then I think that is not enough, or we need to start taking different pictures. So today I am going to post one of the not so perfect family photos, one of the ones that tells a closer version of the real story. 

So in this picture you can see the wind is blowing strong forcing my hair in my face.  My oldest son is not at all thrilled that he has to be there.  My oldest daughter has that are we done yet look on her face.  My husband is frustrated and is ready to beat the two youngest children.  My youngest son is acting like the class clown while his sister is making faces about his behaviour...meanwhile my in laws stand there all smiles ready for the perfect family photo...aren't they going to be surprised.